#87. August All-In Challenge: Do You Need A Reset Too?

Speaker: 00:00:01

They're the joyful agains our children.

2

: 00:00:03

Shout on the swings, the exhausting

agains of cooking and laundry and

3

: 00:00:07

the difficult agains of discipline.

4

: 00:00:10

So much of what we do

as mothers is on repeat.

5

: 00:00:13

So what if we woke up with clarity,

knowing which agains we were called to.

6

: 00:00:17

And went to bed believing we are

faithful in what matters most.

7

: 00:00:21

We believe God's word is

the key to untangle from the

8

: 00:00:24

confusion and overwhelm we feel.

9

: 00:00:27

Let's look up together to embrace a

motherhood full of freedom and joy.

10

: 00:00:33

Welcome to the Again podcast

from Entrusted Ministries.

11

: 00:00:37

I'm your host, Stephanie Hickox, and

today I wanna wish you a happy August.

12

: 00:00:42

You might be thinking, I've got

a pit in my stomach that I just

13

: 00:00:45

turned my calendar to August.

14

: 00:00:47

How did the summer fly by and how

can you be wishing me a happy August?

15

: 00:00:52

I realize that some of that summer

magic of the ability to have your

16

: 00:00:56

kids sleep in have loose bedtimes.

17

: 00:00:58

The fireworks, the some more roasting

and the pool time is dwindling down.

18

: 00:01:03

And that soon many of us will

be heading back to our fall

19

: 00:01:07

schedules and academic routines.

20

: 00:01:09

And of course there's a wonderful

side to all of that too.

21

: 00:01:12

But internally a lot of us are slightly

grieving the wind down of summer.

22

: 00:01:17

I'm calling it happy because I

think that there's something really

23

: 00:01:20

redemptive about saying, we don't have

that much time left of our summer.

24

: 00:01:26

Let's live it up and enjoy

it for all it's worth.

25

: 00:01:30

And to that end, a few years ago, the

Lord led me to create this check for

26

: 00:01:35

myself called the August All In Challenge.

27

: 00:01:39

As the summer is winding down, I thought,

how can I make sure that I'm as present

28

: 00:01:44

as possible with my kids and setting us

all up for success as we head into fall?

29

: 00:01:49

I knew for me that meant

reevaluating my screen time habits

30

: 00:01:54

as much as I try to use my phone for

good and encouragement for others,

31

: 00:01:59

and following up on prayer requests

and tackling administrative tasks

32

: 00:02:03

for my family, the ever present

availability of this little rectangle

33

: 00:02:08

in my pocket can be overwhelming.

34

: 00:02:11

And August, has been a

great time for a reset.

35

: 00:02:14

A couple of years ago, we even offered

some accountability for this in a Facebook

36

: 00:02:18

group, but if you feel the Lord leading

you to have some increased accountability

37

: 00:02:23

in your phone usage and you.

38

: 00:02:24

Hear the spirit prompting you.

39

: 00:02:26

Alright, this is the time,

you could use a reset.

40

: 00:02:30

I would encourage you to

connect with a friend and say,

41

: 00:02:33

I need some accountability.

42

: 00:02:34

Would you check in with me?

43

: 00:02:36

Perhaps it's weekly, perhaps

it's every couple days.

44

: 00:02:38

But if you could establish a way

that they could check in with you to

45

: 00:02:41

make sure that you are staying true

to your goals and not giving up and

46

: 00:02:46

giving into temptation, that is ideal.

47

: 00:02:49

Another way to set yourself up for

success is to write down your goals.

48

: 00:02:54

I believe you are 43% more likely

to follow through with something

49

: 00:02:59

when you actually put pen to paper.

50

: 00:03:01

So go ahead, get it out you don't

need to use my goals or any other

51

: 00:03:05

goals that I list here, but you

can think, what are my temptations?

52

: 00:03:10

Lord, what are the things that

are really pulling me away from

53

: 00:03:14

being present with my kids?

54

: 00:03:15

When do I fall into just

mind numbing, scrolling?

55

: 00:03:20

When am I checking when

it really isn't necessary?

56

: 00:03:23

A first step, I think, is to

acknowledge how much screen time

57

: 00:03:27

are you spending on your phone.

58

: 00:03:29

You can go into the settings on your

phone and actually see that number.

59

: 00:03:35

There are even calculators online that

will tell you if you continue to spend

60

: 00:03:40

that much of your life on your phone,

61

: 00:03:42

what will that accumulate to be that is

a scary enough number, but I think when

62

: 00:03:48

we just see that daily or weekly average,

it's really helpful to know that is time

63

: 00:03:53

that you can't get back with your kids.

64

: 00:03:55

They're going to get older.

65

: 00:03:57

They're not gonna be in your house

forever, and you can't get it back.

66

: 00:04:00

I also know a lot of moms that are

struggling to be faithful in the word.

67

: 00:04:05

Did you know that you could read

through the entire Bible in a year if

68

: 00:04:09

you just read about 15 minutes a day?

69

: 00:04:11

So let's say you're average and

you're spending about three hours on

70

: 00:04:14

your phone a day and you feel like

I don't have time to be in the word.

71

: 00:04:19

Perhaps that number is providing some

accountability that the Lord wants to

72

: 00:04:23

use to prompt your heart to say, you

know what, Lord, I do have time for you.

73

: 00:04:28

Please help me to order my days

in a way that glorifies you more.

74

: 00:04:32

And perhaps you are reading

the Bible on your phone and

75

: 00:04:35

that's part of your screen time.

76

: 00:04:36

That's fantastic.

77

: 00:04:38

And I think for most of us, there

are those activities that are

78

: 00:04:41

filling our time and our days

79

: 00:04:43

that aren't as beneficial as Paul says.

80

: 00:04:46

All things are permissible, but

not all things are beneficial.

81

: 00:04:49

This is a time, this is a moment

where we can evaluate, Lord, how

82

: 00:04:53

can I be using my phone and using

technology to bring you more glory?

83

: 00:04:58

What are the things that

are most beneficial?

84

: 00:05:00

Lord, please help me to not excuse things

that are just permissible in my life.

85

: 00:05:06

Sometimes our thumbs just get habits

or we hear the notification and we are

86

: 00:05:11

quick to look what was that little ding?

87

: 00:05:14

Who was it from?

88

: 00:05:15

Often we need to adjust our

notifications that we're only getting

89

: 00:05:18

them for when it's truly important.

90

: 00:05:21

Perhaps you have a phone spot.

91

: 00:05:23

I know a lot of moms like to put

their phones on top of their fridge so

92

: 00:05:26

that it's available if they're really

needed, but not as much of a temptation

93

: 00:05:31

as in a pocket or on their person.

94

: 00:05:34

It's great to evaluate if I

had a little bit extra time a

95

: 00:05:38

day, what would I do with it?

96

: 00:05:40

So often we're thinking, oh,

I don't have time to work out.

97

: 00:05:42

I don't have time to read my Bible.

98

: 00:05:43

I don't have time to get

together with friends.

99

: 00:05:46

I don't have time to be creative.

100

: 00:05:49

But when we realize how much of our lives

we're handing over to this little device,

101

: 00:05:54

we can own our choices and say,

I'm going to be more intentional.

102

: 00:05:58

I'm going to trade.

103

: 00:06:00

This time for something that's

actually more meaningful in my life.

104

: 00:06:04

A lot of times we're legitimately managing

things on our phones and I'm sure for

105

: 00:06:09

each of us, there is a fraction of the

time that is completely reasonable.

106

: 00:06:14

But so often I find myself not

responding to emails on my phone

107

: 00:06:18

thinking, oh, it'll be just so much

easier if I check that on my computer.

108

: 00:06:21

So why do I keep checking it on my phone?

109

: 00:06:23

I should just be checking my

email on my computer where I

110

: 00:06:27

can be more efficient anyway.

111

: 00:06:28

Also, friends and I have often talked

about how when we're on our phones, our

112

: 00:06:32

children have no idea that we're actually

planning and doing things for them.

113

: 00:06:37

Maybe we're signing them up for fall ball

or flag football or a gymnastics class.

114

: 00:06:43

Maybe we need to set aside a

block of time to do those home

115

: 00:06:47

administrative tasks so that they

don't take over each and every day.

116

: 00:06:51

Let's get back to those.

117

: 00:06:53

Habits that we get ourselves into.

118

: 00:06:55

I will admit humbly that I get in these

patterns of checking Facebook marketplace.

119

: 00:07:01

I don't even go on Instagram or Facebook,

really, but I go on marketplace because

120

: 00:07:07

I wanna make my home a great place for

my family, and I love to get a deal.

121

: 00:07:12

And then I will get in these seasons

where I'm looking for a certain thing and

122

: 00:07:16

don't want the deal to pass me by and I'm

checking it way more often than I wish and

123

: 00:07:23

I don't even have the apps on my phone,

but it's just so easy to open that little

124

: 00:07:27

safari window and type in marketplace.

125

: 00:07:30

And there we are.

126

: 00:07:31

I'm on it again, and I'm not

just looking for the thing

127

: 00:07:34

that I think I'm hunting for.

128

: 00:07:36

All of a sudden, all these other

opportunities are available.

129

: 00:07:39

And most of them I'm thinking,

I don't wanna drive that far.

130

: 00:07:43

I don't wanna unload the seats

in my van to go get that.

131

: 00:07:46

So why do I keep spending

time looking at these items?

132

: 00:07:50

And I think it would help

me if I just wrote down, no

133

: 00:07:53

marketplace on until, this date.

134

: 00:07:56

Or, wait until you really

need to find something.

135

: 00:08:00

If I don't have a huge capacity to

tackle a project, then why am I hunting

136

: 00:08:04

down an item that would require a

shuffle in my house of furniture?

137

: 00:08:09

Can you relate to

anything that I'm saying?

138

: 00:08:11

Maybe you have another temptation.

139

: 00:08:14

Often when I used to go

on Instagram, I would feel

140

: 00:08:17

i'm just gonna go on for a couple minutes

and just have some downtime, and by the

141

: 00:08:21

end of it, I felt like my to-do list

had multiplied by all of these health

142

: 00:08:26

things that I should be looking for

in my kids, or things that made me a

143

: 00:08:30

little bit anxious about them, and I

found that it didn't relax me at all.

144

: 00:08:36

It actually made me unsettled

to be on that platform.

145

: 00:08:40

Of course there were redemptive moments

as well, but the overall messaging wasn't

146

: 00:08:45

what I needed to wind down before bedtime.

147

: 00:08:48

I wanted to share a few goals

that I've had in the past

148

: 00:08:50

for my August All In Talent.

149

: 00:08:53

One was to read my Bible and pray

before checking my email or text.

150

: 00:08:57

One was to check my email only three

times a day and to make sure that I

151

: 00:09:02

was working only within blocks of time.

152

: 00:09:04

I had the goal of having moments of

individual time with each child each

153

: 00:09:09

day so that they knew that they tapped

my list and looking in their eyes was

154

: 00:09:14

way better than looking at my phone.

155

: 00:09:16

I also wouldn't.

156

: 00:09:18

Make sure that I place my phone on

top of my fridge while my kids are

157

: 00:09:21

awake, and I try to keep my daily

pickups to under a certain number.

158

: 00:09:26

Daily pickups can also be found in your

settings, and it's amazing and really

159

: 00:09:32

convicting if you realize how often

you're responding to the ding of your

160

: 00:09:37

phone or just to other people's requests.

161

: 00:09:39

At one point, I also wanted to read a

chapter of a book before I would check

162

: 00:09:44

any social media or unnecessary apps.

163

: 00:09:47

You've heard Emily on the podcast

before if you're a faithful listener,

164

: 00:09:50

and she had some goals that I thought

were wonderful to share as well.

165

: 00:09:54

She said when screen time must

happen work in blocks of time.

166

: 00:09:58

She also turned off

notifications for social media.

167

: 00:10:01

She leaned into scripture memory as

she laid aside the urge to scroll.

168

: 00:10:06

She committed that all phones for

their family must be deposited in a

169

: 00:10:09

phone basket before anyone was allowed

to come to the table for dinner.

170

: 00:10:14

And then she committed to regularly

journal and document God's goodness

171

: 00:10:18

and not just update it on social media.

172

: 00:10:20

How about you?

173

: 00:10:21

How is the Lord working in your heart?

174

: 00:10:24

What are the moments that could be

redeemed to be more beneficial for

175

: 00:10:27

your family and for the kingdom?

176

: 00:10:29

I don't think we're called to

be a hundred percent productive.

177

: 00:10:32

Every day

178

: 00:10:33

But I do think we're called to be

present and we're called to have

179

: 00:10:36

eyes to see how the Lord could use

us, whether it's not turning to our

180

: 00:10:40

phones in the grocery store line so

that we can look up at the strangers

181

: 00:10:44

around us and pray for their hearts,

182

: 00:10:46

I'm gonna close this in prayer,

that we would be faithful to

183

: 00:10:50

how the spirit is prompting us.

184

: 00:10:52

Just as we're leading our kids.

185

: 00:10:53

To be sensitive to the Lord and to

be quick to act on his promptings.

186

: 00:10:58

We wanna model that so

we don't wanna wait.

187

: 00:11:01

This episode is a little shorter.

188

: 00:11:03

Hopefully you can just take a

moment, get out that pencil and

189

: 00:11:05

paper like I said, and write down

what the Lord is calling you to.

190

: 00:11:09

I'm even gonna throw some music in here.

191

: 00:11:11

That you can take time to write it down.

192

: 00:11:13

Maybe you're listening as you're cleaning

or driving and you just need to pause

193

: 00:11:18

and say, I'm going to come back to this.

194

: 00:11:20

Lord, please help me to remember,

because I want to be faithful

195

: 00:11:24

to use my time for your glory.

196

: 00:11:26

It makes me think of a scripture that I

pray often for myself out of Psalm 90.

197

: 00:11:31

Moses wrote this psalm and we think

he probably wrote it near the end

198

: 00:11:35

of his life where he knew he was not

going to enter the promised land.

199

: 00:11:38

It begins.

200

: 00:11:40

So teach us to number our days that

we may gain a heart of wisdom return.

201

: 00:11:44

Oh Lord, how long have

pity on your servants?

202

: 00:11:48

Satisfy us in the morning with

your steadfast love that we may

203

: 00:11:51

rejoice and be glad all our days.

204

: 00:11:54

Make us glad for as many days as

you have afflicted us, and for as

205

: 00:11:57

many years as we have seen evil.

206

: 00:11:59

Let your work be shown to your servants

and your glorious power to their children.

207

: 00:12:04

Let the favor of the Lord our

God be upon us and establish

208

: 00:12:08

the work of our hands upon us.

209

: 00:12:09

Yes, establish the work of our hands.

210

: 00:12:12

Heavenly Father, we come before

you and ask that you would give

211

: 00:12:16

us wisdom to number our days.

212

: 00:12:18

Being a mom can be overwhelming and

filled with so many mundane moments.

213

: 00:12:24

Often we're longing for connection with

others, and it pulls us to our phones.

214

: 00:12:29

And though there are great moments of

connecting through technology, often we

215

: 00:12:34

have to admit that it pulls us away from

those that are right in front of us.

216

: 00:12:38

We ask, Lord, purify our hearts, give

us self-control that we can say no

217

: 00:12:44

to these habits and temptations that

we've allowed to build up in our lives.

218

: 00:12:49

Satisfy us with your steadfast love

that in the morning we reach for

219

: 00:12:54

you and your word over a device.

220

: 00:12:57

Help us to rejoice and be thankful

for the small moments of our lives.

221

: 00:13:02

We may not be living a highlight reel

all the time, but we have an opportunity.

222

: 00:13:06

To walk with you as we walk with our

children, and that is a great delight.

223

: 00:13:11

We pray that we would have eyes to see

how you're working in our family and

224

: 00:13:15

in our children, and that you would

establish the work of our hands, that

225

: 00:13:19

as we seek to point our children to you,

that you would help us to be faithful

226

: 00:13:23

and diligent and present for the task.

227

: 00:13:26

Help us to love you more than anything.

228

: 00:13:28

I pray that we would have the discipline

to seek you and the desire to be in your

229

: 00:13:33

presence, and that you would bless us with

delight as we put you first in all things.

230

: 00:13:39

Pray over every mama listening that

we would be faithful to follow through

231

: 00:13:44

to what you're calling us to.

232

: 00:13:46

And that the habits that you would

like us to have would stay along after

233

: 00:13:50

we turn the calendar to September.

234

: 00:13:52

In Jesus' mighty name we pray.

235

: 00:13:54

Amen.

236

: 00:13:54

I'm putting my pen to

paper right now, mama.

237

: 00:13:57

I hope you are too.

238

: 00:14:52

Can I just say I'm proud of you?

239

: 00:14:54

If you're still listening,

it means you did it.

240

: 00:14:57

I am rooting for you and the Lord is too.

241

: 00:15:00

Isn't it great to know that he is our

biggest cheerleader in our sanctification

242

: 00:15:04

and also that his spirit enables us?

243

: 00:15:06

So take that list and put it

wherever you need it, whether it's

244

: 00:15:10

on your bathroom mirror or on your

nightstand or on your fridge, maybe

245

: 00:15:15

tell your husband about it too.

246

: 00:15:16

And a friend, maybe even tell your kids,

this is what I'm committing to this month.

247

: 00:15:21

Hold me to it kiddos, maybe you're

gonna lead your whole family in

248

: 00:15:25

a charge to reset technology.

249

: 00:15:27

Also, if you're really all in on this

August all in challenge and you're

250

: 00:15:31

just ready for a scary level of

accountability, feel free to email me.

251

: 00:15:36

I would love what you're committing

to and I will just shoot you

252

: 00:15:39

back a good for you, mama.

253

: 00:15:41

I'm rooting for you.

254

: 00:15:43

My email is stephanie@ewok.com.

255

: 00:15:47

That's Stephanie at EWAC h.com.

256

: 00:15:51

We are rooting for you

and we've got megaphones.

257

: 00:15:54

Which leads me that I wanna reveal who

our special guest is going to be when

258

: 00:15:59

we return for the podcast in September.

259

: 00:16:02

The Dream podcast guest that said

yes to being on the Again podcast

260

: 00:16:07

is none other than Aaron Lochner.

261

: 00:16:11

Erin Lochner was a huge social

media influencer, and she

262

: 00:16:15

even had her own HGTV show.

263

: 00:16:17

Then she wrote the book Chasing

Slow and she walked away from

264

: 00:16:21

all of her influencing platforms.

265

: 00:16:24

She still blogs, but she does it

in the most genuine, wonderful way.

266

: 00:16:29

I had a delightful conversation with her

over chasing Slow and her new book, the

267

: 00:16:34

Opt Out Family, and she challenges the

current trends of thinking on technology

268

: 00:16:39

in a really radical, winsome way.

269

: 00:16:42

I can't wait for you to

hear our conversation.

270

: 00:16:45

Like I said, we're gonna

be back in September.

271

: 00:16:48

We have some great interviews.

272

: 00:16:50

I also sat down with a biblical counselor

friend and her husband, who's also a

273

: 00:16:54

biblical counselor, and they talked

about what does it look like to embrace

274

: 00:16:58

biblical womanhood or biblical manhood?

275

: 00:17:01

Also, what can we say to the mom who

says, I really want my husband to

276

: 00:17:05

lead, but I don't know how to help him.

277

: 00:17:08

What are we doing that maybe is

preventing him from stepping up and

278

: 00:17:11

how can we encourage him in that?

279

: 00:17:13

They also talk about prodigal children

and how painful that experience

280

: 00:17:18

can be that conversation is gonna

bless moms of every age and stage.

281

: 00:17:23

We've got lots of fun updates coming,

but really we do believe that what

282

: 00:17:28

you do over and over matters to God.

283

: 00:17:30

So we wanna make sure we give

you time to seek the best things.

284

: 00:17:34

We'll see you soon, mama.

285

: 00:17:35

Have a great August.